As I was just finishing that post about 'writers block', I turned to look at my good television where I was watching "17 News @ 11" (must be said in the deep announcers voice) where I currant story caught my eye. Therefore, I have done further research.
Ever since I can remember, the 4th of July has been a big deal. The week leading up to it is exciting. We buy fireworks, boxes and boxes of them, get our ingredients to make homemade ice cream, decide what is for dinner, and then get our matches bought and ready. Although the location of these events for my family has always changed between grandmother's and different house locations, it always was the same.
I remember when I was probably 5, my older brother (who was probably only 8 or 9) thought it would be cool to light the fireworks. At my old house, we had two big tall trees in the front yard. He takes one of those fireworks that spin and light up and he sticks it on a already existing nail on the tree. As I sat at my grandpa's feet, we were busy focused straight ahead instead of what was behind. Jack lights up the firework and it spins off the tree and hits my grandpa. He took off running. I couldn't decide whether he was laughing in pain or crying.
Many other stories I remember from the 4th, but not all were funny.
Every year we go over to my grandma's the Saturday night before the 4th, have a day with the cousins full of swimming and ice cream and movies and we await the stroke of 10 when the fireworks at the Bakersfield Speedway explode into the smoggy sky. One year, We all sat on our blankets watching the fireworks explode. You could hear all of the gathered "Ohh's" and "Ahh's" from not only the neighborhood, but also the stands of the raceway. Well, after the 'grand finale', I remember looking to the side of the house directly in front of my grammie's. I saw an orange glow. I looked at my mom and said "Mommy, I don't think that is suppose to glow". They assured me it was just reflection from the smoke. But my 7 year old instincts new better. I ran into the house, grabbed my grammie's cat and jumped in the car and began screaming how I wanted to leave because the house was going to burn down. Finally, we could hear the neighbors screaming that the foothills [Cheapskate hill for my fellow know-ers] directly in front of the Speedway was on fire. My family scattered in a 100 directions. The roof was being watered down, pictures and documents were being gathered, animals thrown in the back seat and as we drove away, we saw it, the entire 13ish acre field was on fire. We later found out that one of the "professional" fireworks was a dud in the sky and fell, were normally they wouldn't light, it sure enough caught fire.
Why I say this comes to the words released by Arnold [let me try this] Schwarzenagger stating "Don't buy the fireworks. Don't go out and play with fireworks because its just too dry and too dangerous to do these things" simply confuses me (News10 of Sacramento). Understanding both the pros and cons of fire. Understanding that possibly 1/16 of California is burning, understanding the risks, is it still worth taking away a 5 year olds memory? I am not one sided on this only because I feel both ways. I, myself, am afraid of fire in itself. It's hard for me to light a candle much less a firework. I just wonder if some things, like this, are a risk worth taking. It really seems a risk. I mean, it could go two ways, Bakersfield could burn down, or a family of 4 kids can have an amazing time writing their names in the air with sparklers. A part of me wants to say "4th of July has nothing to do with fireworks. The fourth of July is marking the day that our founding fathers signed the declaration of Independence, LET'S HUNT EGGS NOW!" So I want to be prude and say "ban fireworks", but then again, I wouldn't have wanted my memories of my ideal fourth taken from me.
Where I led up to is this, what do you feel about the fourth? Fireworks, or No? What is your greatest 4th memory?
(I also want to note that I understand fireworks are not illegal this year, Mr Terminator just recommended we stay away from the stands)
Oh and, I don't like the air quality for about a month after the 4th. I wonder if coach will allow us to do an indoor practice. Maybe, popcorn and a movie? Sandlot! Now THAT is team bonding!
Since I didn't really talk about it at all in my 'About Me' and Ms Dana asked me about it, I will go ahead and just post a blog with a little more about me.
I grew up in Oildale. Went to Highland Ele, Standard MS, and now North High. When I was in the 6th grade we moved out here in the North West where my parents attempted to move me to Norris. Didn't work out. I was miserable and hated it so, as a little princess I am (or sometimes wish I am) my parents moved me back to SMS and proceeded to drive me back-and-forth every day (and trust me, I know Snow/Norris Rd. like the back of my hand !!).
Anyways, growing up I have always been able to speak. And, I have always loved speaking to adults, my teachers, friends' parents, anyone who would listen and just cared about what I had to say. I felt kids my age were immature, so I went after an audience that would understand and care. I remember my first grade teacher, Ms. Erwin, Gosh, that woman made SUCH and impact on my life. I give her most of the credit for who I am. She listened when nobody else did. She taught me that not by words can something be portrayed by also by actions. And through her actions she let me know that there will be someone out there to listen, I just have to find them. She also taught me to write cursive. I was so stubborn that my poor 3rd grade teacher (who was a first year) could not get through my "I can't do it". So, Erwin taught me something else I use still today... "It is not that you can't, it is that you wont". Wow.
I never had a teacher like her. I had some killer ones along the way that really changed who I was and how I thought. Mrs Wonderly, my 5th grade, is still in my life today as my "godmother" and mentor. Steve Duerr, 7th & 8th grade science teacher, is the one who showed me the light of Jesus Christ and a major reason I became a Christian.
Then there is the story of my freshman English teacher, Mrs Sherley. Yes, when you hear her name you think of a fat-old wrinkily woman with a wart on her cheek and chain on her glasses, but no, she's MUCH worse than that :D. Totally kidding, she is a small, skinny, beautiful woman, but has a tough-as-nails personality. I remember we would have two page essays to do in one night, I would be up till 3:00 just finishing them. The reason they were so dread full is because of the horrible "Jane Shaffer" way of doing it. Ugh, she should be met in a dark ally for creating such a thing. Anyways, she taught us really how to put our thoughts down on paper correctly. However, I never use any of the formats as she taught us because I don't believe writing should have a format. I believe that writing is something that comes from your heart and however it is construed on paper, well, that's how it should be.
One thing she did tell me is I am "too wordy" and "use too many commas", well, Mrs Sherley, this, is, for, you...
(Oh, and by the way, Sherley is moving to Frontier as an English teacher, I assume Freshman. Parents, I recomend you get your sons and daughters in her class. They will hate it, they will kick and scream and cry just as I and all my friends did, but, she's amazing. I recieved a 460 on the English part of the standardized testing, she is probably the best in Bakersfield)
I also wrote an 8th grade graduation speech.
That year, a classmate of ours died after being struck by a car skateboarding. It opened so many emotional doors that a speech like mine was necessary. I had parents in tears, students in shock, it was great to just impact people in that way.
I also plan on writing a high school speech.
It's in the works. I still have two years. :D
I wonder sometimes if young athletes are expected of too much these days. I don't know whether that sentence even makes sense but, what I mean is, as an athlete who would LOVE to receive a scholarship to Sac State to play ball, I feel like I am not doing enough to stand out to the college coaches.
Here's my summer schedule; Lessons for catching and hitting in the mornings, the edge (ran by Terrio. FANTASTIC, if i might add) for an hour 3 days a week, then travel team practice from 6-dark daily, then sometimes some sort of team bonding after practice. I have a tournament every other weekend, scrimmages some afternoons, and barely any time for summer "break". In the fall, I will play fall ball, on-top of MORE lessons, more practices, extracurricular activities such as school clubs and church volunteer, i will be Junior Class president next year so I will have ASB stuff, AP and Honors classes, and I am also playing Tennis because it "looks better when you have more than one sport". And I know I am not even doing as much as many of my teammates are.
I just feel that sometimes I am over-achieving, trying TOO hard to get into these amazing schools I dream of attending, and I fear sometimes that it all wont even matter, I will of 'wasted my time', and I wont (Hm. question. Why don't we say "will'nt" instead of wont? like, will-not, will'nt. hm) even get looked at for softball.
The pressure these days is on us kids badly. Our parents want it for us, our families are supporting us, our coaches are helping us, and all we want to do is just get it done. I feel the pressure from other players, seeing all they are doing and achieving, which makes me just want to one-up 'em like any good competitor does. I feel pushed by everyone to do more and more and sometimes worry if I will be paying for it in the future whether it be physically or mentally...
Well, I am off to work-out now, then practice tonight. And I am missing a church get-together, too. Dang.
My dream life for the next two years;
Get faster, hit more home-runs during games, have my name in The Bakersfield Californian with my stats, get recruited by at least two schools, and have fun doing it all... Oh, and making First-team All-League wouldn't hurt any :D
Whoa! I am so honored to now have my own blog on Northwestern Voice. I am constantly eagerly awaiting the next issue so I can see who i recognize, whether the are a part of my past, a part of my present, and wondering if they could possibly be part of my future.
Speaking of people of my past. My mind has been wondering recently. With the end of the year being just a week ago, it is yearbook time, my FAVORITE part of the school year. However, this year, I found myself fingering through a yearbook from the past.
It was my 5th grade yearbook. Wow, right, but remember I am 16 and 5th grade really DOES seem like a long time ago. Just think, how much did your own life change from 5th-11th grade?
I read where all my best little friends signed it saying "BF4EVER" or "Dont ever chang" and the greatest is when a little boy put his name and number and that's all. I laugh reading all the spelling errors, grammar problems, and horrible kid handwriting. But what saddens me, is the change of it all. Only one of those friends I called my best friend then, is still my best friend now.
The others have gone their separate ways. some are part of the clique sports teams, some are "emo", some dropped out of school, some are becoming young mothers, and others have just drifted away.
It bothers me. It bothers me that in some of those lost friendships, words were left unsaid and the wrong things were actually said...
i miss those friends. and i miss that innocence we all held not only in our spirits, but in our thoughts and minds.
sometimes it's hard to look back at all the things that have changed, who you lost along the way, and how much of it is your fault.
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